Drug Abuse and Meth Addiction
Drug abuse and addiction have been a part of John’s life since he was a kid. He grew up poor with a biker father in Louisiana. John was the smallest member of his family, so he felt that his life was rougher than most. He talks about how he often picked fights with his dad and his siblings.
John talks about how at a young age, he was selling Ecstasy and other drugs that were popular in Louisiana at the time. He mainly used Marijuana and Alcohol, but his drug abuse didn’t get serious until he tried Meth for the first time.
Using Meth, John soon became hooked and spiraled out of control from drug addiction. He also tells us about his time in grade school. During the 9th grade, John was expelled from school twice, however, he later went on to get his GED.
John didn’t realize how much he needed his family around until his addiction caused his family to cut ties. He was so used to them enabling his behavior that when they decided they couldn’t deal with it anymore, John’s situation worsened.
Drugs and Crime
When Johns older brother moved to Tucson, AZ, he prompted him to buy a bus ticket out to stay with him. After John came to Arizona, he started using Meth and his brother couldn’t deal with him anymore. So, John moved out and headed out on his own in the new state.
Alone and with nowhere to turn, he became associated with dangerous people who did more than sell drugs. For John, these people became incredibly important as they supplied him with food and drugs; he explains that he would have done anything for them.
The only way John knew to prove himself to the people in his life was to be ready to do anything at a moment’s notice, no matter what. Being in the life he was in, the consequences of drug abuse brought enemies and eventually he and the people he associated with wound up in a shootout.
Police officers were nearby and witnessed John and another in the shooting. Both John and his accomplice were eventually caught; however, his accomplice, one of the people John felt closest to, labeled him a monster to get out of charges himself.
The arrest led John to take a plea deal for 3-12.5 years. Overall, he was sentenced to 10 years in prison. John tells us how the judge told him that its only by the grace of God that he is not before the court for multiple counts of murder.
Parole Violation for Drug Abuse
After all, he had experienced, John couldn’t have prepared himself for what happened when he got out of prison. He got a job and worked hard at it, becoming a supervisor within six months.
He had the responsibility of managing work crews that spanned across all of Southern Arizona. With time, John started to pick up the habits of those he worked with. Going to a bar every Friday with his co-workers eventually lead John to drink a beer.
That one drink was all it took to reignite his addiction and in less than three months, he was back to using Methamphetamine. Unfortunately, because he was out of prison, John’s return to Meth use was a violation of his parole, and he was back on the run from the authorities in no time.
He knew what he was doing was wrong, saying that he became a bad person in his addiction; he wasn’t nice to anyone. John truly believed that he was going to die and end up in hell.
Meth Symptoms of Psychosis
Due to a combination of smoking weed and using an egregious amount of methamphetamine, he was awake for days. Suffering from extreme exhaustion, John entered into a drug-induced meth psychosis.
He states that he knew everything he had done was wrong, but it didn’t matter because he did it anyway. Feeling as though he was a perfect fit for hell and that judgment was being cast upon him. John recalls one day when he left someone’s apartment, he had no shoes on, and intentionally rammed his face into a handicapped parking sign.
This action resulted in him bending the sign and splitting his face open. During this moment, John watched the blood fall from his face to the ground, thinking that the pouring blood was a good thing.
He explains that he was afraid to die because he believed that dying while using drugs, without having made amends, was something to fear. The police were nearby and noticed the situation taking place, so John ran.
Of course, the police ended up catching him, which resulted in being tased. John goes on to explain that he believed the police officers were demons, chasing him and trying to drag him down to hell. With multiple police officers trying to subdue him, he kept screaming “No! God please!”
Addiction and Fear of Death
John woke up in the hospital with asphalt still stuck in his flesh, handcuffed and with huge bandages all over his body. One police officer was sitting next to his bed and told John that with all he had seen over the years on the force, he didn’t think John would survive.
The officer went on to tell him that he was lucky and added, “Kid, I’m glad to see you alive.” It turns out that John had flatlined in the hospital and the doctors had given up, but the police officer said to try one more time, saving John’s life.
He was in serious pain from the third-degree burns on his body; the gauzes on his feet were stuck to the blood and the fluids that his injured limbs were producing. From the hospital, John returned to prison due to his parole violation.
As soon as John got out, he relapsed and started using Meth again and didn’t sleep for 5 days. He was caught in possession of Meth and was sentenced to a year in prison. Upon release from prison, John went to the Salvation Army for drug treatment.
He was there for a month, but 6 weeks after his release he was caught in a stolen car. This time, when paroled, John was given a choice to parole anywhere other than Tucson—he chose Phoenix, Arizona and entered the rooms of Narcotics Anonymous (NA).
Narcotics Anonymous and Addiction Recovery
Three indispensable things in NA are honesty, open-mindedness, and willingness. He had heard of NA, but he didn’t think that he had a chance at recovery in Tucson due to his notoriety. He knew that he had to make a radical change and that he couldn’t do it alone.
On June 11, 2016, he got sober and has been sober for over 2 years. John is also engaged to an amazing woman and they are looking at buying a house together. His life now is a miracle and he helps people.
The best way to explain his life now, he found, is a proverb that says, “As long as a man is joined to all the living there is hope. For a living dog is better than a dead lion.” John says to newcomers and those still in addiction to always try your best. It won’t always look good; you will fail at times, but you should never stop trying. There is always light at the end of the tunnel.
As long as you draw breath you have hope. That hope should motivate you to keep trying. Despair comes from giving up. You have to say something; reach out for help. Admit you have a problem—you have to, and never give up. The miracles of NA can help you too. You can stop drug abuse and addiction and we can help – give us a call at (866) 578-7471.