Becoming Addicted to Cocaine
Marc always felt different than the other members of his big Italian family and eventually developed a deadly cocaine addiction. He couldn’t read very well, he struggled in school and was diagnosed with a learning disability. When his peers started to bully and make fun of him for it, he felt rejected and out of place.
He recalls that he was forced into trying weed for the first time in high school and he didn’t enjoy the experience. He also hated the taste of beer when he tried drinking for the first time.
Later, when he rediscovered weed, he had a better experience. Similarly, once he found a drink that tasted good, he liked Alcohol a lot more. Eventually, he started smoking weed regularly and drinking, which soon led him to try Cocaine.
Drugs did nothing to help him fit in, but they made him feel okay with who he was.
Cocaine and Alcohol Use Turns Deadly
His drug use soon became a problem and he attended rehab on many occasions; once when he was seventeen years old, again at eighteen and then at nineteen. He got into a terrible car accident that almost killed him because of his substance abuse. He was technically dead for two and a half minutes and then was in a coma for two days. His skull was cracked, and he now has three metal plates in his face.
After surviving this, Marc felt invincible. It took a long time for his face to heal and look normal again, though, which made him want to continue using drugs. He spent a year in county jail and immediately started abusing Cocaine when he got out.
Even though he moved around to different cities from time to time, the change of scenery wasn’t enough to change his behavior.
He got a union job and married a woman who was struggling with alcoholism and an eating disorder. They had a baby together and Marc was able to distract himself by trying to fix his wife’s issues, even though he was a wreck himself.
First Encounter with God and Recovery
Marc wasn’t happy though, and he realized that something had to change, so he got divorced and they both went to rehab centers in different states. He found religion when he got out, and discovered a peace and love in faith that he hadn’t experienced before. Unfortunately, faith in God, his higher power, alone wasn’t enough.
He wasn’t working the steps, and he eventually relapsed as he sunk deeper into the disease of addiction. He started to do Oxycontin and was turned on to smoking crack. He got hooked on Roxies and Methadone, while he continued to abuse Cocaine. All the while, his kids were in the care of his family members.
As his shame and disappointment with himself grew, he used more and more drugs. This spiraled into an ugly, but powerful, cycle of sickness. He moved to Nebraska this time, which only continued the cycle of drug use, abusing pills and shooting up Cocaine.
It seemed like no matter where he went or what he did, he would never be able to stop using drugs.
Emerging from the Fog of Addiction
One day, Marc’s brother bought him a nonrefundable bus ticket to a rehab in Arizona. While he was on the two-day long bus ride, Marc saw families and mothers on the bus, taking care of their children, and realized how badly he still wanted to be there for his own family.
He felt that God was speaking to him, and something became clear on that bus ride: he decided that he was going to do whatever it took to get sober when he arrived in Arizona. He went to the rehab and completely surrendered himself to recovery. He did everything he was told and followed the Big Book’s instructions.
Marc finally started to rebuild his life on the foundation of sobriety. He has been sober for over a year, today, and hasn’t shot Cocaine in over a year and two months. He has come full circle and now sponsors people who are working through the program. He uses his experience in recovery to help others.
If you feel hopeless or lost in the fog of addiction, there are people like Marc who want to help you. It is never too late to get your life back. Call (866) 578-7471 to speak with someone who will listen to your story and help you decide on the best way forward.
